Movie Review of Remember Me

Exclusive Trailer, Story description and Movie Review for 'Remember Me'

Director Allen Coulter and writer Will Fetters didn't want us to forget "Remember Me," so they sandpapered their standard script with an indie grit. They somehow snared "Twilight" hottie Robert Pattinson. And they set their mediocre romance on the eve of 9/11.

Robert Pattinson's fans are not going to be pleased with what the critics are writing about their hero and about his latest movie -- not that their reviews will matter one iota when they head for the theaters this weekend. Most of the reviews for Remember Me can be summed up in two words Forget it! Manohla Dargis in the New York Times calls it "absurdly contrived" and describes Pattinson as "a conceivably promising, certainly watchable actor in need of an immediate acting intervention." Kyle Smith in the New York Post compares Pattinson to the much maligned actor Hayden Christensen.

If you don't want to know what happens at the end of Remember Me, then stop reading now.

Remember Me is the most dispiriting load of old wallop I've sat through this century. It's not just that the film is bad – there's plenty of bad films that I've loved from beginning to end – it's that Remember Me is completely fraudulent. The film starts in 1991, with the murder of a young mother in front of her 10-year-old daughter.

A detective who attends the crime is the husband of the victim, and the father of the little girl. A "10 years later" title comes on screen, and Robert Pattinson appears, wearing the first of his endless collection of torn jeans and faded T-shirt ensembles, and mumbles his way into a relationship with Emilie de Ravin (Lost), who is the 10-year-old girl all grown up.

Pattinson is the sole reason this movie has ever made it into the multiplex. Without Pattinson, a film this pointless and infuriating could only have been (a) French and (b) on at the film festival. But, the world is full of teenagers who've been getting all tingly for the great shambling moppet ever since he first slouched into a Harry Potter.

And to be fair, the problem with Remember Me isn't the performances. Pattinson does an okayish James Dean impersonation, that almost looks like acting if you squint hard enough. Chris Cooper is fine as de Ravin's over-protective cop dad, and Pierce Brosnan dials in a watchable turn as Pattinson's wealthy lawyer poppa. (Though Brosnan's idea of a New York accent is pretty hilarious).

No, what sinks Remember Me is the script: Pattinson feels hard done by because his dad doesn't pay him enough attention. Then de Ravin throws a paddy as she realises that Pattinson only asked her out to get back at her dad, who had arrested him a few months earlier, possibly for sulking. The big act two turning point arrives when Pattinson's kid sister gets a bad haircut. (No, really.) At around the hour-and-a-half mark, whatever dramatic potential Remember Me had is long exhausted.



But how do you end a story that has never really begun? By flying a whacking great aeroplane straight into your lead actor, that's how. Remember how this film is set 10 years after 1991? Well, guess which building Pattinson's daddy has his law firm in ... There are great films yet to be made set against the horror's of September 11, 2001. But to casually co-opt the murder of 3000 people into your screenplay because you want to give your meandering drivel a bit of spurious tragedy and meaning is just plain wrong.

For 100 minutes or so of Remember Me, I figured I was watching a tedious but harmless teen romance. For the last 10 I reali
sed I was watching the most misguided, pretentious, and offensive film I've seen in years.

REMEMBER ME

Rating : 9/11
Starring : Robert Pattinson, Emilie de Ravin, Pierce Brosnan, Chris Cooper.
Duration : (112 mins)
Direction : Allen Coulter.